You Gotta Have Friends

26 March, 2008 (09:54) | Friends, Guest Bloggers, Social Media, Twitter

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Dear friends,

Thank you for your patience while I’ve been silent. I’m feeling much better now. Later this week, I have another guest post by Allan Cockerill to share with you, but for today I thought I’d see if I remember how to write. Plus, I really wanted to say thank you to my friends who have stepped in to help while I’ve been absent.

A few years back, when I found out I was pregnant with J, I was put on modified bed rest due to a back injury a year earlier. I could do some stuff, but housework and most other things fell to Ken and W (who was 4 at the time). I was amazed at the friends who came to help, doing everything from actually cleaning my house (hubbies and 4 yr olds don’t usually meet the same standards) to bringing by home-cooked meals, to following me to the gas station and pumping gas for me. One friend would even bring the garbage can to the curb for me if Ken was out of town.

Zagnut

Friends off-line are wonderful. What I never expected though, was to have the same treatment online. Allan Cockerill of Coffee with Allan Cockerill and Ange of Buzzing with Ange both wrote guest posts, and Marc of techne-eikon.com reminded me that he’s promised to write one also.

Thanks so much, all of you! I don’t have words to express how much your friendship and help has meant to me.

Friendship has been on my mind a lot lately. Social websites brought people together who most likely wouldn’t hang out on traditional forums or chat rooms, for example, among my friends online there are people of all ages, and some who are painfully shy, introverts, people with dyslexia, autism, etc. Sites like StumbleUpon, Facebook, etc. make it easy to find others with interests similar to your own, while allowing you to choose the level of interaction you’re comfortable with.

For most of the social sites, you don’t even need to have friends online to start, just sign up and start playing with the site options…friends will come…like writing a blog, people will come to see what you have to say, and if they like it, they’ll stay. Before you know it, you’ll have a whole group of new friends on the site, most with similar interests to your own.

Twitter is one of the few exceptions to this, one of the rare sites where you really do need friends to enjoy it. It’s not hard to make Twitter friends, but it can be slow starting out. If you are trying to get started on Twitter, feel free to add me as a friend. I’d love to know that you visited my blog too, if you want to send me a message.

I sometimes hear people describe off-line friends as “real” and on-line as “virtual.” To me, all my friendships are real, regardless of whether I see them face to face, visit them on a social site, or send letters to a penpal. I wouldn’t even know how to draw a line…perhaps because I met my husband in a chat room and one of my best friends off line was introduced to me by one of my best friends online.

How about you? Is there a difference in your offline and online friendships? What are your thoughts on online friendships and social networks? I’d love to hear them.

Tags: Friends, Social Media, Twitter

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Comments

Comment from Allan Cockerill
Time March 26, 2008 at 8:45 pm

Hey Teeg,

Thanks for the kind comments (he says as he gets over the blushing bit).

I think that friends are friends, whether they are online or offline. The thing that is lacking with online friendships is the face to face contact, but that doesn’t necessarily devalue them as far as I am concerned.

The old proverb says something like ‘to have a friend, one needs to be a friend…’ and this applies on the internet.

As far as I am concerned Teeg, you are indeed a friend, and so it is quite natural to offer help if it’s needed.

While some regard friends that they meet on social networking sites or in chat rooms as part of a list to sell to, you are someone who is quite prepared to BE a friend.

Thank you for that, and I look forward to hearing that you’ve fully recovered.

Cheers!

Allan Cockerill’s last blog post..The Spam Free Way To Market And Promote On Facebook

Trackback from Fractured Bloughts
Time March 28, 2008 at 10:11 am

“I made intimacy a superficial gesture”…

By the end of the day, I’d talked to most of my friends… Sometimes I’m not sure I even have any friends. I may just have a large group of people that I tell everything to. It’s like I’ve made intimacy a superficial gesture…

Comment from Despil
Time March 28, 2008 at 10:18 am

I just linked my post on the “friendships online” topic, if you don’t mind, I did not want to write it here again.

I treat all my friends, both offline and online ones the same, although for me that part is not too hard, I am mostly interested in people as people, personality and mind, and that is real both off and online.

I have to add thought that for me friend is a strong word, and no offense meant to anyone, but I have only four of them - I have to add though, that for me friend means I can trust him or her with my life, health, money and all without doubt.
But there is no difference between off and online friends.

I don’t know you too much as we met on twitter only a month or so ago, but I like your writings and your personality, and was a bit worried as you disappeared.
Hope all is ok now and you are back:)

Despil’s last blog post..“I made intimacy a superficial gesture”

Comment from Buzzing with Ange
Time March 31, 2008 at 9:09 am

Hey Teeg!! It’s great to see you back here with a post… and thanks for the plug! I was glad to help and I have missed our chats and interaction online.

I regard offline and online friends the same way too. Some you have more to do with than others, however, all are regarded as friends. Social networking has brought me into contact with more people than I ever imagined and it is great to get to know them too through the various communities.

I heard today that Camilla and Sarah are back at Taggz with a whole new look so I guess that chat will be up and running again very soon.

Sending love and peace your way for a full recovery very, very soon and I’m looking forward to you posting again
Buzzing with Ange’s last blog post..Joe Vitale and His 15 Minute Miracle

Comment from mousewords
Time March 31, 2008 at 7:38 pm

I used to think that online acquaintances wouldn’t be the same as face-to-face friendships. But as I spend more time online, I’m finding that friends are friends–online or off. Sometimes you get to know a person more quickly online, as they share their thoughts more freely. Meeting them face-to-face fills in the other half, so I look forward to meeting more of my online friends in person.

And I’m glad to have met you as a friend!

mousewords’s last blog post..Fear of Success

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Time April 2, 2008 at 4:54 am